Five Major Complaints About Long Hair

I’ve had long hair my entire life. It can be beautiful, luscious, an attention-getter, and all the other good stuff. But it can also be a real bitch. If you’re thinking about growing it out, prepare yourself. It can be hellish.  Just so you know what you’re getting into, I’ll give you 5 reasons that long hair can be the absolute worst.

1. People like to play with it.
I’ll never understand it. When I was a kid, my hair was a magnet for stupid jerks who think pulling hair is HILARIOUS. Guess what, that shit hurts. Of course, less people cause you physical harm for no reason as you age. They just find new ways. They want to do your hair for you, drunkenly play with it, put it on their head. Sometimes it’s funny. Sometimes it’s violatory. It is just one of the pains that come with the territory.

2. There is always going to be something in your face.
Wanna put the windows down? Better have something to take care of all the hair that’s going to swallow your face. Wanna walk down the street when there’s a slight breeze? Good luck with that.

3. Keeping your hair up
If you have thick hair like mine, you’re gonna have a hard time. Any kind of hair device I attempt to use will eventually snap in my fingers. I get it thinned out from time to time, but it grows at an inhuman pace. I need it up a lot. And it really doesn’t like being put up ever. My hair and I have differing interests.

4. Trying to get some texture
Those long beautiful straight manes you always see in the shampoo commercials? Looks good, but that’s about as much as it will ever do. Without some serious chemical influence (not recommended) this hair’s not gonna curl, wave, or do anything. Gravity wins this one, ladies.

5. It gets messy. 
When you get caught in the wind, the ocean, or some random goo–you’re gonna have to get a hairbrush through that. And you’re gonna need a whole bottle of leave-in conditioner to boot. I broke a hairbrush once, you know.


I’m not saying that long hair is the absolute worst. Most see it as a blessing. I do love it from time to time. One just needs to understand the hefty responsibility sometimes. Ya gotta learn to roll with the tangles, ladies. Good luck.


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